Reflecting and Responding to Words
One thing I love to teach my students and clients about journaling is that it doesn’t always have to be you vs. the blank page. There are so many entry points into writing with the intention of self-reflection and introspection that we couldn’t possibly list them all. But there are two practices that I frequently turn to when the well of inspiration has dried up or I stumble across something that inspires or moves me to respond to it.
These two techniques use text from someone else as source material. By that, I do not mean that we are using their words or passing them off as our own. What I mean is that we enter into a conversation with the text within our own personal journals in order to probe and excavate our thoughts in a more directed way.
This source text can be anything you find compelling, or interesting, or inspiring. For me though, it often comes from the writers I follow on Substack or Essayists.
These two techniques may share the same source material, but they diverge in the approach to the material — though both are also deceptively simple.
I will explain both techniques (with examples) and then offer you an invitation to do it yourself. These techniques are what shaped this month’s theme, so throughout this issue, you’ll see the techniques being used in practice.
Technique #1: The Essay Overlay
Sometimes, someone else's words hit a chord with us in a way that we haven't been able to articulate ourselves and yet, we may find ourselves commenting or wanting to respond to the piece as a way of further introspection. The Essay Overlay allows for that “margin writing” opportunity to get into dialogue with the piece and the reflections coming from it.
Step One:
Find a piece of text that has captured your attention and/or stimulated something within you. Maybe the piece affirms and speaks to a certain experience you’ve had. Maybe the piece is in opposition to your beliefs. Perhaps the piece is just so well written, that it has moved you enough to want to engage with it. Whatever the reason may be, if it evokes or stirs your emotions, it’s probably good source material.
Step Two:
Move the text into a place that will allow you to write your thoughts either in line with the text or as a comment. Many word processing applications have this ability like Word, Google Docs, Pages, etc. There are also many apps that have this functionality like Notion (my go-to), and Craft (my second go-to). Alternatively, if you use an iPad or tablet and have the ability to write directly on the document (like in Goodnotes) that will work as well. You could even use the native “notes” option on your mobile device.
Step Three:
Once you’ve moved the text into a place where you can adequately respond, it’s time to start journaling/reflecting. I encourage my students and clients to start line by line until an obvious sentence or sentiment pops out. Then you will either use the “comment” functionality or simply write in the margins about any questions, reflections, or introspection you may have. You’ll continue this process throughout the whole piece.
Step Four (optional):
If you feel like you did a thorough job of questioning, reflecting, responding, and journaling the first time through, you are done and can skip this step! However, I often like to go through it a second time reading both the piece AND what I’ve written side by side to see if any other patterns or “a-ha’s” come up.
And that’s it! It almost seems too easy but it’s actually an extremely powerful technique and exercise when you go into it with intention and an openness to see what comes up.
Case Study
For the purposes of this case study, I had a friend write a short personal essay that I could use with permission to demonstrate how this technique works.
Embracing the Unknown: My Dance with Fear and Liberation by Libby P.
In the quiet recesses of our hearts, where introspection meets vulnerability, we all encounter moments when fear becomes so palpable that all we yearn for is an escape. For me, this was orchestrated by a narcissistic superior. It was not just the relentless indifference or the patronizing undertones. It was the insidious feeling that my very essence, my self-worth, hinged on her fleeting nods of approval. Essentially, I became a prisoner to a relentless trio: fear, anxiety, and self-doubt. [Wow. I really resonate with this. I also went through something similar and it took me wayyyy too long to extricate myself from the situation. I thought then it was simply a matter of financial constraint. I needed the money. But after leaving, I realized it was probably more of what she talks about here… the fear of the unknown. The self-doubt that I’d let creep into my psyche.]
Let me be clear though, things weren’t always like this. It wasn’t until I’d spent a significant amount of time with this person and their company that I started to see the cracks in the veneer. I tried to pass it off as being a part of my imagination or perhaps I’d taken what she’d said or done out of context. I buried my head in the sand with justifications that I was above the gossip and not a target of her negative whims. [Oh my. My heart really feels this. It doesn’t seem like it would or should affect someone so much, but it really does. In my situation though, I feel more responsible for my own suffering because I didn’t bury my head in the sand. I knew what was going on, but I refused to accept it for what it was and kept justifying my reasons for staying even knowing what I knew. I had no illusions that the person I was dealing with would spare me in her attempts to destroy me should she have the chance. I was under no illusions that she would suddenly “change” or wake up to what she was doing. I was just simply too scared to let go.]
I was wrong.
Eventually, my epiphany emerged not from combat, but from surrender—not to her, but to the vast uncertainty that lay outside the prison of my own limiting beliefs.
Leaving that job was like standing on the edge of an abyss. The void was filled with fears of unpaid bills, the daunting prospect of job hunting, and the echoing whispers of “What next?”. But alongside the fear was a simmering rage. A rage towards my own complacency, for having ceded my narrative to another. A rage towards a world where figures of authority sometimes exploit rather than nurture. [THIS. SO MUCH THIS. Yes, this is definitely more in line with what I felt… a rage and anger that I had allowed myself to fall under her spell in the beginning, and then anger toward myself for allowing her cycles of instability to affect me. But what really pisses me off is that I was a core part of helping her build her business and making her a lot of money. And I only ever saw a tiny portion of that money come to the people who deserved it. And yet… I stayed out of fear that I needed what little money I was getting for the job I was doing because I didn’t believe I had it within myself to do it on my own.]
That rage intensified when I realized the length to which this woman had wielded her power over others, especially since she was in a position of authority dedicated to “helping others.” How many vulnerable people did she manipulate and coerce into her vortex? How many of those left it feeling terrible shame, confusion, and frustration over their experiences? I hope I never find out because it will only enrage me, further. [This breaks my heart and is also similar to how I felt toward the end of my time, too. I had watched so many of my colleagues become her “targets” and watched as she discarded them like trash. She simply used them and then tossed them aside when they no longer had value to her. Or challenged her. So I totally understand and feel the same rage that the author talks about here.]
Time has passed since my exit from that world. The shadows of fear and uncertainty still visit, but they now coexist with moments of serenity and joy. The anger that once consumed me has given way to introspection. I've come to understand that the greatest act of defiance against such toxicity is not resentment, but healing, growth, and reclamation of one's own narrative. [This author is much nicer than I am, lol. For me, one of the greatest acts of defiance was leaving when this woman needed business help the most. I left knowing I was leaving them in a lurch and that this was one bridge I didn’t care about that burned to ashes. I welcomed it, actually. I didn’t want the colleagues that I loved and cared for to be the victims as well, but I had a secret hope that once things started to crumble around them, they’d realize too that it was time to get out before the ship sank completely. I’m not sure if I achieved that, but I also am not in the position to see the inner workings any longer. I made a very strategic decision to safeguard what little creativity I had left after being drained of it while working for this person and that also feels empowering and defiant. To succeed without her financial help.]
Succumbing to the uncertainties of life, as I've learned, can be an act of profound courage. It entails embracing vulnerability, stepping out of one's comfort zone, and confronting the unknown. It's a challenging endeavor, but the rewards are immeasurable. By sharing my story, I hope to kindle a spark in those who find themselves in similar situations, to inspire them to embrace the unknown, and to script their own narratives of liberation and rebirth outside the toxic walls they’ve felt imprisoned in. [Gah, this is so true. I felt such a mixture of emotions the day I put in my resignation. Fear, uncertainty, self-doubt but also, freedom, and a deep inner-knowing that it was the right decision. That deep inner-knowing is what fuels me to keep going with my own projects and business. Knowing that I could have never fully reached my potential by remaining under her thumb. Health-wise, I also knew that if I didn’t get the hell out, my body would revolt in ways that were far more damaging than the fear I had around leaving.]
• • •
Wow. This piece really resonated with me on a lot of levels. I can see how someone else’s experience with a narcissistic superior mirrors many of the experiences and emotions I felt in my own situation. It makes me feel less alone. It reminds me that while situations may be different — the trauma and emotional warfare we endure are relatable. Reading back my margin notes, I noticed how much I allowed fear to dictate my thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Even my decisions were fear-based until the end when I gathered up the courage to leave. It also makes me feel compassionate for that version of me who struggled to find the words to express how toxic the situation was.
Technique #2: Reimagining
There are certain pieces of text that follow a structure or a set of questions that the author then answer within the text. These types of texts are ripe for reimagining them with your own answers to the structure or questions posed within the original source.
Step One:
This step follows the same approach as the Essay Overlay technique, the big difference being that the text source you choose for this technique has an inherent structure or set of questions that you can reimagine. A quick example would be a piece of text where the author has listed the books that have impacted their life along with the why/how. Another example might be a piece of text that relies on several questions to inform the piece.
Step Two:
Begin to “reimagine” the piece from your own perspective in your journal. Using the example from above, let’s say I begin to journal about the books that have impacted my life along with the why/how. While writing your own reflections and answers to the structure or questions, you may find patterns or previously un-examined thoughts or beliefs as you reimagine. This is good!
Step Three:
Once you’ve reimagined the piece in your own words and your own way — it’s time to reflect on the reimagining as a whole. Do you feel like you achieved what you needed or wanted to from doing this reimagining? Did you find anything interesting or curious about what you wrote? What did doing this exercise tell you about yourself?
Case Study
For this case study, I took a recent favorite essay that I loved and reimagined it. The text source comes from Jasmine Johnston.
I love Jasmine Johnston’s piece, “3 gifts i gave myself” for both it’s depth and it’s structure. I found it to be an extremely generative piece for me by reimagining what gifts I’ve given myself in the last few years of deep growth and evolution. These gifts were both obvious and not-so-obvious for my highest well-being. Some of them were hard won, while some were merely a recognition of what I needed when I needed it.
Spirituality
I’ve talked about this before, but it is important enough for me to keep reminding myself that the gift of spirituality is ever changing and ever evolving. I was very much a “non-spiritual” person before the pandemic happened and when I look back at that time in my life, I’m amazed at how well I managed to get through life without any spirituality in sight. To me, true spirituality is like opening a can of Pringles — once you pop the top, you can’t stop. There’s no way I could NOT be spiritual now that I have experienced it.
I’m not talking about religion, here. I’m talking about the spirituality that is individualized and meaningful to the person experiencing it. My spirituality is not defined by one “god” and it does not have dogma attached to it. Rather, it’s a very deep inner knowing and connection with something that is beyond me. Something that is beyond comprehension, really.
My spirituality guides me when I feel lost. It has become my north star when the darkness settles in and I don’t know where to turn. It is the constant companion I can trust. It’s the reason my faith in humanity has been restored. It’s the hand that reaches for me and pulls me back up.
I honestly don’t know where I’d be today, in this moment, had I not given myself this gift of exploring my spirituality. I’m just grateful that I did.
Perseverance
The six or so years that I stopped writing fiction were some of the darkest days of my life. I can’t point to ONE singular reason or experience that led to my writing draught, only that it happened and it was awful. I’ve known my entire life that writing is my calling… my purpose. And yet, there I was… not doing the thing that I knew I should and wanted to be doing. I had all these preconceived expectations and thoughts surrounding fiction writing as well as so many emotions wrapped up around writing fiction as an identity. I felt completely insecure when before the draught, I’d written and published 20+ books. I think this was possibly the most damaging thought I had during those days… the shame of knowing I did it before and I simply could not do it now. Then, I read Julia Cameron’s The Right to Write which completely blew my mind and made me think of writing from a different perspective. I started writing my daily pages. I started conversing with other people in the writing world. I started to dip my toe back into writing fiction.
I gave myself the gift of trying again… of persevering despite what I believed to be true about myself and my writing.
That perseverance is what led me back to fiction writing. It’s what led me to take a chance on submitting one of my stories to a workshop where I got a lot of great feedback. That led me to submit it to a highly regarded writing workshop in Dublin, Ireland (and ya’ll know how that turned out!).
Had I not given myself the gift of perseverance, I’m not sure I would be writing today. But that gift was exactly what I needed to move forward with my writing and crush some of the limiting beliefs I held around it.
Connection
I’m an extreme introvert and the idea of joining a daily journaling group did not appeal to me at first. My gut reaction to this idea was, “Yuck! Why would I do that?!” But in the spirit of “trying new things,” I decided to check it out. While the writing portion of the group was great in getting me back into a routine of writing daily, it was actually the connection with the other members that became the real gift.
I’m perpetually anxious about speaking in front of others, my mouth sometimes blurting out things before I’ve had a chance to think about them (I’m NOT a verbal processor!). I’m awkward and make things uncomfortable. So needless to say, I didn’t expect to jive with this group of women I started spending my mornings with.
But the beautiful gift that I gave myself was the opportunity to connect with them. Not just a surface level connection, but a deep, all consuming connection with them. This gift has spiraled into giving me some of the most important relationships of my life. The connection I feel for some of these women is soul-deep. I’ve opened myself up to them in a way that I haven’t done with most people. Sometimes, not even my husband (who I believe to be my best and most trusted friend and partner). These women have seen me at my worst and at my best. They have been by my side through some of the hardest moments I’ve ever encountered. They have become the best friends I didn’t know that I needed.
All because I gave myself the gift of connection.
A Note On Your Text Sources
It's understandable to have questions around the ethics of using someone else's words in your journaling practice. However, it's important to know that using source material as a baseline for your thoughts and reflections is a common and legitimate technique. Your art and writing are a product of your experiences, beliefs, and culture, and you're never creating completely out of thin air.
It's important to note that you're not taking the source material and passing it off as your own. You're using it to inform and inspire your own writing, and your thoughts are not the author's thoughts. You're coming to your own conclusions and epiphanies around what the text source has brought up for you. You're not claiming any ownership or rights over the text source, and there's no value in doing so.
If you choose to share your journaling publicly, it's essential to do your due diligence and ask for permission to reprint or use someone else's work. If you're doing a "reimagining" and not using any of the author's text, it's often sufficient to credit and link to the author's text source as a way of honoring their work as an influence on your own.
Remember, if it stays in your journal, anything goes. Nonetheless, it's always best to err on the side of caution and seek permission before sharing someone else's work.
